Together with their families

Olivia CisnerosandMatthew Rothberg

request the pleasure of your company
Saturday, the twenty-sixth of September

DEFCON 5 Denial

Weddinggeddon

Olivia is marrying Matt on purpose. You have been selected to witness it, and then to make it weird.

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Saturday, September 26, 2026. 5:30 PM sharp. Pier Sixty, New York City.

Chaos forecast

Our meteorologists have modeled Saturday night hour by hour. Conditions deteriorate rapidly after the salad course.

    Reception bingo

    Your card is yours alone. Tap a square when you witness it. Tap it with shame when it was you. Five in a row wins the respect of nobody.

    The Rothberg sportsbook

    You have 1,000 Rothbucks. They are worth nothing, much like the groom's promise that he "won't cry." Tap a line to put 100 on it.

    Which wedding disaster are you?

    Five questions. Brutal accuracy. Find out now so your friends can plan around you.

    Training camp

    Nobody runs a marathon cold. One drill unlocks each day between now and the wedding. Come back tomorrow. Champions are made in the offseason.

      Terms & Conditions of Attendance

      By opening this link you have already agreed. Counsel has advised us to put the actually useful information in here too.

      1. Arrival. Guests shall arrive by 5:30 PM. The ceremony will not wait for you, and walking in behind the bride is a felony in the state of New York.
      2. The Bar. The bar is open. This is a privilege and not a dare. The Couple accepts no liability for anything you say after your fourth drink, particularly to somebody's boss.
      3. The Microphone. The microphone is for people who were asked. If nobody asked you, you were not asked. "Just a quick thing" is not a legal defense.
      4. Things People Brought. If a man you met nine minutes ago offers you something out of a breath mint tin, it is not a breath mint. Management saw nothing, knows nothing, and would like you to drink some water.
      5. The Groom. The Groom built five separate websites for this wedding, including this one. Nobody asked for any of them. Guests agree not to bring this up while he is crying, which will be often.
      6. The Bride. The Bride is out of everyone's league, the Groom's especially. Guests agree to stop pointing this out by 9:00 PM.
      7. Sunday. Sunday is your problem.
      The real details, no jokes Saturday, September 26, 2026. Arrive by 5:30 PM.
      Pier Sixty, Chelsea Piers, New York, NY 10011. Valet parking is provided.
      Hotels: The Standard, High Line and Dream Downtown.
      Everything else (schedule, dress code, room blocks, registry) lives at rothbergs.com.

      Hype reactor

      Every smash is counted, worldwide, forever. The button does nothing else. That has never stopped you before.

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      total smashes by all guests